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TO FEEL OR NOT TO FEEL: SHOULD WE LIVE A LIFE OF FEELING OR BLOCK OUT THE PAIN?

I grew up in a family of rational, left-brained people. I prided myself on keeping my emotions in check and remaining cool and collected. Then, anxiety struck me with a vengeance, and I ended up on an analyst’s couch 3 days a week in my early 20’s.

My client, Joe, who is in the throes of grieving a love relationship is desperately...

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Hope: MY GIFT TO YOU IN 2021

Introduction

Years ago, I lost my ability to hope. I had sustained a major loss, and the pain seemed unmanageable. I waited and waited, hoping the agony would evaporate.

Just at the point where I could see no way out, I looked up at the blue sky and saw Hope. The sky was full of it.

I can’t lie to you. Right now, the world feels...

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The Single Most Important Ingredient of a Successful Relationship

Introduction

If I were to ask you to name the single most important factor that you believe contributes to a rewarding and successful romantic relationship, you might well argue that empathy, communication, trust, or perhaps sex is the most essential.

While these, indeed, are critical components of successful relationships, they are not the ...

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THE PANDEMIC THANKSGIVING

I think most of us can agree that 2020 has been a year we won’t look back on fondly.  Rather, it’s a year that we’re all collectively just trying to get through.  Our lives are different, internally and externally, due to the devastation of the pandemic.

If you are struggling to feel the Thanksgiving gratitude you...

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The Lost art of Listening: Reconciling Differences Between Couples and a Divided Nation

Introduction

One would profoundly hope that the Coronavirus, a killer disease, would “bring us together” as a nation.  Instead, it has served less to unite us than to underscore what divides us. 

Reading daily about this deepening, widespread national polarization has caused me to reflect on the couples I treat and the...

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A Pandemic Pep Talk

Introduction

I just finished a session with a client who is very caught up in the panic and stress of the pandemic and the uncertainty of the world around us.

Listen, I get it.  Life is tough right now.  We’re all taking a beating and it’s hard not to wallow in these heavy emotions of stress, fear, doubt, and...

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What Do Ruth Bader Ginsburg, A Marriage of Equals and COVID 19 Have In Common?

PLENTY, IT TURNS OUT.

Justice Ginsburg spent her life building a world in which women and men were on equal footing, at home, in their personal relationships, and well beyond.  

With the Covid 19 pandemic alive and well, and no end in sight, the battle for gender equality and women’s independence that Ginsburg fought so hard for...

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Acedia – The Pandemic Emotion No One Talks About - But Everyone Feels

 

If your emotions feel like a rollercoaster because of Covid 19, you’re not alone.

In my practice I’ve seen everything from people shutting down and having no motivation or feeling tired, restless, worried, sad, overwhelmed, exhausted or angry, not to mention being terrified by the uncertainty of not knowing what comes next.

...

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Are You Losing Motivation To Be Cautious During The Pandemic? If So, Here’s How To Get Your Groove Back

Introduction

Ever since Michelle Obama gave us permission to feel depressed about the pandemic and the state of our Nation, I have allowed myself to feel that not only am I down and out about our country’s state of affairs, but if I am brutally honest, I am lacking the motivation and energy I had when the pandemic first broke out to wear a...

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Find Meaning In The COVID Pandemic: Begin By Helping Others

Recently, after spending more time than I care to admit feeling angry, lonely and oh so sorry for myself because of being isolated from friends and family due to the pandemic, I decided I had better change my way of thinking and feeling and consider how to transform what I was experiencing as personal adversity into greater wisdom and meaning in...

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