Our Success Stories

Many of my clients have thanked me for having helped them through their divorce, here's what some of them have to say:

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Some journeys are better not taken alone. I went to see Dr. Hecker after many years deep in a quandary over my failing marriage. I knew I was unhappy and painfully despondent. Tried as I might, I could not clearly examine the situation or see what my options might be. I had become locked in a vicious cycle of what I came to call “infected thinking,” a virus of negativity and regret that kept me from moving forward in any way.

I found it very difficult to take the step of calling Dr. Hecker. Despite my unhappiness, my overwhelming feeling was fear – or was it shame?—to admit my marriage was in trouble. I felt as if I was betraying my husband in reaching out to a professional. It was nothing of the sort, of course, but I could not see that until I had pierced the silence and communicated honestly with a professional with experience in such matters.

Dr. Hecker’s approach is an effective mixture of psychoanalysis and behavioral therapy. We talked about my childhood and delved deeply into the key relationships in my life. But Dr. Hecker also made me aware of what I could do to self-monitor and modify dead-end patterns of behavior.

Two aspects of Dr. Hecker’s professional style stand out: She never prejudiced me either toward staying with my husband or leaving him. She had no agenda in this regard. I felt that decision was completely my own. What Dr. Hecker did was help me to understand my own wants and needs. I took things from there.

Dr, Hecker has a tremendous work ethnic. She was always prepared at the beginning of our sessions, having reviewed her notes. She offered insights by connecting comments I had made over the span of several sessions or several months. Perhaps you will think that this is what every therapist does. But in talking to friends, I have learned that Dr. Hecker’s familiarity and grasp of my personal narrative is unusual.

My journey started with a discreet mission—whether or not to stay in my marriage—but it took on larger meaning as I worked with Dr, Hecker. It became a path to self-realization—still ongoing and sometimes difficult, but greatly rewarding.

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Feeling full of pain and despair during my marriage breakdown, I turned to Dr. Deborah Hecker. It was truly the best gift I could have given myself. The process that Dr. Hecker led me through and the growth that I experienced were so incredibly helpful to me. I learned to laugh again and to feel good about myself. Thank you, Dr. Hecker, for helping me heal and giving me the tools to move forward.

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In all reality, I probably met Dr. Hecker at the lowest point in my life. I went to Dr. Hecker feeling alone, scared, anxious and was grieving the loss of my marriage and family life the way I had known it for 25 years. I truly didn't know how to get through the day, which way to turn. I felt an immediate connection to her kindness, intelligence and ability to connect to me and what I was feeling. That was most important. I turned to Dr. Hecker and she helped me see that I could and would survive the losses I was experiencing. Through the last four years, with her help I have been able to learn that I was capable of building a new life, finding the joy in it wherever I could and I've learned to count of myself. Dr. Hecker has gently brought me to see that there are ways to build happiness again and she has navigated this new world with me..always always available to shine the light on a difficult time. Her consistent and constant support has surely been the reason I survived.

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While the concept of theraphy via the telephone might be considered unusual, it has been perfect for me. It has allowed me flexibility in scheduling and completely eliminates "drive time" to and from an office. That aside, Dr. Hecker has turned my life around. She is the real deal.

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I've been working with Debbie for a couple of months now and I feel lucky to have this resource. She has been a voice of reason when nothing seems to make sense. She is very objective, but also knows when to prompt you to assert yourself Divorce or separation is such an isolating time- it certainly has been for me. Debbie provides a consistent source of guidance in ways that friends and family simply can't. She has helped me release a tremendous sense of failure and enabled me to see the opportunities for growth.

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Dr. Hecker has helped me believe in myself. She gives me tasks and tools which assist me to approach my relationships with more love and understanding than I ever thought possible. I understand now that within the context of attachment to others, I am still my own person, and need to maintain my own identity. Dr. Hecker has helped me realize that my self worth is not measured by what my partner thinks of me, but rather my ability to love and depend on myself. For me, use of the telephone is an extremely comfortable and effective way to resolve my conflicts.

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Debbie Hecker, Ph.D. is the consummate professional. I have had the privilege of both meeting with Debbie in person as well as by phone when I moved to the West Coast. She always has a compassionate ear, listening extreme well to everything I say. She is forthright with her guidance, dedicated to her clients, and exhibits the utmost integrity in her work. Debbie is consistently your strongest advocate. I recommend her highly and without reservation.

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